My Seeds are my Root!

This is blog is dedicated to both Nilaa and Oviyaa and from both Leela and I. The below write up was kind of our first on Nilaa who was the star of the week in her school. And while we were drafting this, I realized that these kids are the inspiration behind the wild run that am making along with Leela. In today's world, when there is a sacrifice made, we expect that to be recognized. But our kids make a lot of sacrifices without even realizing that they do and yet do not complain on the short of recognition. Without dragging too much below was our account on Nilaa as much as possible. This stems my view on what we leave in our child is more important that what we leave for them! 

- Raj.

Nilaa, the Moon!

Thanks for this opportunity to write about Nilaa, which we have not had it before in our lives!

Right from the birth, she has always been very active and can’t stay idle in a place for more than 2 minutes. To get her to be tired used to be our daily goal at one point in time! It used to be really funny to bathe her, tough to feed her and getting her to bed to make her sleep as always been a tiresome exercise for her mom. However, over the years, she has transformed herself into an independent lady and now does these things all by herself, though sometimes slow. But, rewards and recognition works well with her to get a job done!

She loves to get to her school always. The only complaint that she had about schools was that she misses schools during our transition phases. She probably has a uniqueness in having attended many schools at Chennai and Erode in India, Derby in the UK and now here in Plano, the US!

She just loves being outside of the house wherever it was. Be it in India, in the UK or now in the US, she just wants to head out to the park to ride a bicycle or play with her friends that she had made all by herself in a very short duration. We have seen that she gets into a leadership role quickly and the team responds to her positively! In sports, she wants to be a basketball player.

She loves her family pretty much and are fond of her aunts and cousins. She absolutely adores and takes care of her little sister Oviyaa. Both these girls now have a separate room for themselves and Nilaa takes care of the younger one during the nights! Oviyaa is yet to get to a play school, but Nilaa ensures that she does not miss that. We often get to visualize her class teachers in her mono acts as teaches her little sister, teaching good things in life.

Nilaa is a very good listener, but often pays attention only to things that matters or interests her. She likes to be surprised every now and then. Last summer, exactly during the same week, we made a trip to India from the UK and we kept it as a surprise! She did not realize that she is in India, until we got out of the airport and met with her uncles and aunts awaiting to receive us. She simply loved it.

As with every child and every respective parents, Nilaa being our first child is the meaning of our lives. There are a lot of things and emotions that she gave us for the first time and continues to give us every single day.

More than anything, what we adore about her is the way she has inspired us to embrace changes in life. In the name of opportunity to us, we have challenged her by putting her in different schools, across cities, countries and continents! Yet, she neither complained nor was she bogged down. She had adapted to every environment very seamlessly without ever needing us to help her in transitions. In fact, she had shown us, the parents, that all these challenges are opportunities to explore and learn new things in life. An Inspiration!

True to the meaning of her name, she guides us as a light in our lives! Nilaa is a star to your class and a moon to us. Nilaa literally means moon in our mother tongue Thamizh!

Just to end it on a lighter note, we chose her name over a carom board game!

We love her as our life and are sure Gulledge will take good care of her. Thanks for having her part of this institution and all the best to everyone at Gulledge!

- Leela and Raj

Happy 2016!

I think our determination as much as I thought we would need, to make ourselves better, was a bit lacking. I would still call this year as a year of Determination like last year.

Therefore, my New Year wishes from this blog is referred to last year's as the request is still relevant!

Live and let Live! Happy New Year to one and all!

- Raj

Tolerance in India

What the FFFF is called intolerance growing?

First up, apologies on the foul language that I would use on the title and the below write up..

Second, am not a supporter of any party or organization, a pure common man and I think I'm a bit rationale...

I have been reading the stories of intolerance growing in our country and the intellectuals that most I do not even (frankly, but unfortunately) know were giving up their awards or accolades given by pervious government. Frankly, I do care, because it is their right of expression. But what I do care is the notion of intolerance growing within India. So here is my perspective and frankly a frustrated angry one! Just to sum it up before I write the entire emotions down, I see that India is the most tolerant nation and if not, tell me what the FFFF you mean by intolerance.

Let me tell my rationale why I think India is tolerant.....

In a country with so many children, we have made Education a business sector. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

In a country with 1.3 billion population, healthcare is business sector. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

A land that was once agriculture rich country, we let farmers die. They die not because of starvation, but because of the fact that their dignity is not spared. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

A nationalized bank says it cannot recover loan from a baron who owns an airline, a cricket team, a liquor company and of course few girls each (I mean no disgrace to females here), we run an OTS scheme for farmers and threaten to take away his land if he does not comply. And we who are fed by them do not do anything about. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

Just for one exceptional torrential rain, cities like Mumbai, Chennai just go under water. We know the cause, we still will let it happen. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

We know IPL is scam and yet we follow. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

We allow politicians or the rich to run BCCI. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

When we drive, we see a signal, we see someone ahead of us jumping it what we do is we jump along with that someone. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

In a country where a lot of young bearcats join civil services, they join as corrupt ones. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

We followed an election were voters were only 3000+ with lot more enthusiasm than a state or a central elections. Because Cinema! Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

We let corrupt politicians come back to power and we hug them, get blessings from them and claim them as king makers. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

And these corrupt politicians come out of a case not because they are corrupt free, but this is corruption spree within the Judiciary. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

We are made to think that Indrani Mukerjee is more important than the rape victims within India. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

When chief minister or a minister or even a leader of the opposition or even worse a small time MLA councilor goes through the traffic and everyone else stops because he has the flag of a party. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

When a greedy influential person wants to encroach someone's land, the entire systems supports and we learn to live with that. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

We even take Nature for a ride, deforestation, CO2, land, Lakes, canals and what not?! Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

In a country where all 4 pillars of democracy (Legislature, Judiciary, Executive & Media) is corrupt, we keep our mouth shut and still listen to their stories and worst is, we believe in their stories. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

The rusted pillars have effectively made our enablers (Healthcare, Education, Infrastructure etc.,.) as the blockers and we still get going with them. Now if this is not tolerance, what the FFFF is tolerance?

And there are many more like jumping queues, tatkal for Gods, to conversions, to beef to what not! And we are more tolerant than what we thing we are!

Yes! I lived in a country for a while where healthcare and education are free and equal! I'm not writing this because am an NRI or someone who lived abroad and come back to complain against the country. This for all I know used to be land of morality and honesty. We have lost both for greed of power and money. If this country has to change, it has to be us who does the change and not expect an IPS or a MLA or an advocate or Journalist or a doctor or an engineer to be perfectly honest!

Again, am sorry about my language. But I do not think the F word is worse than the ones that were/are used by the so called intellectuals, the political parties and the media! 

I have learnt and now believe that we are most hypocratic country in the world! And Yes I know I need to be a bit more tolerant now! What the FFFF!!??!!

- Raj

Alyan Kurdi....

May you rest in peace after making quite a lot of us restless and helpless inhuman!

While the pressures of migrants are real, all this family was doing is trying to find a way to live. And the world leaders are responsible for this, not for stopping immigrants, but to have created the conflicts in the first place. 

It is just GREED!!!! This greed of only an handful of people is moving out ethnics of their own country fleeing their homes. I strongly feel that this is the start of the end of this world and this civilization however modern we think we are. If the greedy do not understand the needy it is their bodies that need to be washed to the shores and not a 3 year old's! I dare not post that picture for after a long time it brought tears to my eyes!

Am sorry Alyan Kurdi.

India Salutes Indu Mukund

In the memory of Major Mukund Varadharajan. Jai Hind!

I was watching the Indian Republic day parade of 2015 and the first on the agenda was Ashok Chakra which is India’s highest peacetime gallantry award. First to come up was Mrs. Indu Mukund wife of Major Mukund who lost is life while fighting terrorists in Kashmir. She stood there before the most powerful men of the land President Pranab, PM Modi, the most powerful person on the earth, President Obama and watched by millions around the world. What struck me was how composed and calm she was, head held high with no tears, no expressing of pain or sorrow but a sheer exhibition of Pride of being Mukund's wife. I was thinking, if Mukund was around he would have been so proud of this young lady who was not perturbed by any of those nuances as she was just doing it for Mukund and her daughter. He would have been more proud to have Mrs. Indu Mukund as his wife than probably the award in itself.

While like everything in life around us, from a plane crash to an hurricane to a conflict to even an homicide, for everyone who is not related to Major Mukund his martyrdom and the emotions it created should have been long lost in memory. No complaints because that is just the way life is. None of us can carry everything with us all the time. But those memories and emotions were back at the moment I saw her walk up those steps and stood up in the most dignified manner one can! Courageous! Not about standing in front of those many people but to fight those emotions that she alone can understand; to fight the pain that she alone can feel! Courageous! This shows the love she has for her man.

And it just so happened that I had to watch her interview to Barka on NDTV, I was so inspired for the strong will she exhibited on TV which strikingly similar to what I thought she would have gone through those moments while walking up those steps. There were quite a few quotes during that interview which will linger in my mind forever. 

It's because of the love I have for him; not had.

He would love to see me happy. My strength to lead an happy life and give my daughter an happy life comes from that.

Every love is different. 

The Tag line in NDTV sums up all "India Should See The Man Mukund Was, Not My Sorrow." 

She could have become emotional or been on tears at every single moment in that interview, but she chose not to; not even during read out of the poem she wrote the day after Major Mukund's death. 

For me, she is an inspiration to continue to live on, no matter what happens. I've lost quite a few so close to my heart and of course I have learnt to live without them. But, that's not what am talking about that now. Its also about those small issues, petty politics at work, small differences within relationships, a rainy day, a sunny day, a snowy day, a small feeling of victory in all of these and what not! This young but strong lady showed me how life can't be shallow; how to celebrate life; how to celebrate one's life; how to life an happy life for other's sake!

Mrs. Indu Mukund, I do not know if ever you would get to read my post, but do know that you have an admirer. I hope the nation and the government supports you to lead an happy life and help you in fulfilling your dream of giving your daughter an happy life! I wish that nature gives you all the strength and courage in life and reach the end you wish for (albeit slowly), that is to reach Major Mukund who will be waiting to hug you with all the smiles!

To me you are not a soldier's wife, but a soldier.

I cannot be emotional. Am just inspired!!! .

Cheers! 

On Behalf of every Indian, Raj

PS.: I do realize there are a lot of soldiers like Mrs. Indu Mukund and this is dedicated to all of them. Hail them all!

Happy 2015!

While I called 2014 as the year of Hope, I want to call this year as the year of Determination.

We have come too far, too away from life with a lot of greed and hatred in the very name of life, God and Religion. 

Be it wars, be it bombs, be it storming a school and killing children, be it raping a friend, be it shooting down a flight, and quite a lot more of actions like these makes me say that we are not humans any more. Our souls are corrupt and our hearts there by empty!

Let us in this New Year, bring in the courage and determination into our souls to start changing ourselves to be Humans again; For no more children should die or girls be raped in the name of anything! 

Let the New Year take away all the greed and hatred....

Let the New Year bring in lot more giving and love...

Let this year of determination bring back the peace and harmony into the world, because we all deserve it!

Let us all enjoy the joy of giving and be loved!

Charlie Chaplin had said it long back.............

A very Happy and Joyous New Year to everyone!

Let my path be determined by my soul...
என் ஜீவன் போடும் பாதையில் போவேன்...

Regards,
Raj

Can't find a name for this Write Up!

For once am going to keep it short because whatever more I say may dilute what I intend to say!

I watched this unfortunate clip and wanted to express my sadness on the sorry state of affairs and my desperation for a change in the system.

I cannot blame these individuals and it is in fact unfair that she/he are on this clip. There is nothing funny about this clip, but rather something serious that India needs to consider for itself to even think it can be a force to reckon with. Education is not just a right, but it has to be right as well! We need right teachers and trainers. Pull in every scholar/leader in the country, from APJ to Narayana Murthy, they would fondly remember about at least one teacher who made a difference to them. We need to change!

I'm glad that I was built and trained by a great set of teachers from the best school ever and a great college. But not all is so fortunate like me and my friends. Almost 70% (I might be wrong) of the country's kids are built by people like her! And with this if India can achieve what we have achieved so far, imagine what would be our strength if the system corrected itself by just another 20%!

Not sure how we could take the message to the powers to be and I wish if not through this blog at least somehow they understand what needs to be done!

Again.. I'm sorry for these individuals on the clip and I would call her the flag bearer for change than a scape goat!

- Raj

PS.: If this video violates any copyright, please write to me I shall delete it.

Happy Deepavali.

A very long one, for those who have the patience to understand the hypocrisy of us, the current generation! For we are not responsible else where in the name of pollution, but only on a Deepavali day!

It's Deepavali, probably the first in my life that we miss being with the rest of the family since my birth. While those are mixed emotions which am not penning down now but when I look back and compare at the festivity when I was young and what it is now, I felt in the name of technology and progress we are taking away a lot of fun that my generation had when we kids.

I vividly remember the build up to Deepavali each year. Even 6 or 8 weeks earlier to that we will start thinking about new dresses! Yes those were days when we got dresses for festivals and special occasions and not necessarily because we can afford to buy. In our days we used to be content with those dresses for the whole of the year and would use it extra carefully to ensure that they do not get worn out or seen as often as possible. These days, we buy stuff just because we can afford. Not necessarily clothing's, but anything!

Then the dreams of various crackers. We would have made up our mind on what we would want and would have built a virtual list of sorts to take it to our parents for funding. 

Then comes the last 4 weeks where everything in the town would go bizarre. All of sudden discounts, shops really filled up, friends checking on whether we started shopping, families recommending good shops etc.,. Shopping for clothes used to be a special occasion by itself. I do remember those days when we had done with shopping earlier, I used to try my new clothes almost every single day or at least fondly have a look at it.

Then the last 2 days, Crackers! This is where almost of our generation would have learnt the art of bargain and negotiations. Albeit with our respective Dads. Often there would be push backs either on costs or on security, but we would somehow be able to reach a truce between ourselves and then starts the boasting around! The local friends circle whenever we get together for weekend cricket or evening chats, all of the talks would be around the crackers and some will say he got this much and I would counter it with something. This was more like building our own self esteem!

Meanwhile, when the children would be working on the clothes and crackers, the elders would be checking on the organizing the entire event. There goes the formal invites in the face of respect to the daughters' families and where appropriate clothes for them as well. Then comes the planning for sweets where a cook (who will be in greater demand) and bring his team home and prepare homemade sweets not just for the family, but for friends and acquaintances. I still have the image of our cook who would make sweets for 2 long days with his team and how we were prohibited from tasting those sweets until it was all approved! All that was prepared would be boxed and would go rounds to friends and the members of the company. We would also start receiving a lot of sweets from our friends and families as well. No restrictions whatsoever on what needs to be ate. I know my dad and uncle used to print greeting cards and post it to friends!

Then the D-Day where almost a 3 day break would be in and we would be waiting for the entire cousin set to arrive and the eve of Deepavali would be just crackers, crackers and crackers. We would normally go to bed around 11:00 in the night and wake up as early as possible to ensure that we were the firsts to start firing crackers on that day. But we would do so only with a lot of discipline. We will have an oil batch, then offer prayers to God and then start the fire works as early as 4:00 AM in the morning. As much as it would be fun, it was a competition as well as in, for the noise levels, the dust on the streets and later on in the night the sky fire works! It was such a joyous moment.

Coming back to reality, I think we are robbing these joys from this generation and the following ones. There is no excitement whatsoever for these kids because they have everything that they need and they treat this day as another holiday. Most of us are glued to the TV sets; all greetings are on FB/WhasApp. Furthermore, with whatever new found wisdom about pollution, we are asking for an e-Deepavali I believe. I don't know what it means but literally no crackers! While pollution is a larger problem and for all I know when I drive once between Chennai to Erode I pollute more than what I did in my Deepavali day, or carbon emissions from industries or an ozone penetrating aircraft pollution or for that matter New Year celebrations even within India or IPL start and closing ceremonies we burn crackers. And we ask these kids to stop firing crackers in the name of pollution! 

I know crackers were not what Deepavali is all about. It is festival of lights! Got it!! But in the name of responsibility, we are robbing the excitement, the joy from these kids. This is why I call it hypocrisy!!!

I know this could potentially be counter argued but the more mature and people with more sense of responsibility than me, but I do stand by what I say. We should fire crackers.

I know this could potentially be misconstrued as a Hindu thing by the more secular folks, but I do stand by what I say. We should fire crackers.

When I look at my nieces and nephews, there is no excitement. They deserve this excitement for Deepavali to be much more colourful than it is these days!

For those who fire crackers! Have a safe and Happy Deepavali! For those of you who all celebrating an e-Deepavali, Happy Deepavali. Think about firing crackers please! It is so much Fun.

Happy Deepavali Folks!

Regards,

Raj.

B' Day - 2014

One more year passes and one more time... Greetings on Facebook, WhatsApp, Telegram, email (surprise that we still have it) and even on Linked In this time... Just happy that I was on the minds of so many individuals during these testing times.

On my last b' day, like every year, no resolutions made, but a few minor tweaks to me, my life style that I intended to make, a couple of which am able to continue and as always, quite a few that I missed pursuing. But as always, no regrets as there is no point.

It's been quite an interesting b'day year. Last birth day was so a quite an one when we spent the entire day as a family at Erode and this year only 4 us here in Derby! Well, yes! Could not believe that I said an yes to uproot my family and have them go through the pain of this hard transition in every sense, leaving my root alone, schooling for Nilaa, the reduction in affection for Oviyaa and of course everything for Leela, to name a few; the sacrifices that they have made is tremendous. I just wish that I do some justice for the pain that they undergo.

Yes, it is for my career sake that I did accept this unfamiliar role which was a bit of struggle in this uneasy terrain, but, I think as like everyone, am now up and running. There are a lot more stuff to learn and I would keep running I believe.

I do miss the warmth of being in my homeland and the comfort of knowing that my blood lives just 400 KMS away. I do miss the strength my friends gave me. I do miss the humidity of Chennai, the smell of sea and India at large, but that is the choice that I did make and I'll live with that. That said, I'm fortunate enough to have the same comfort and strength here in the UK! I don't know how mother nature enables me with a life full of good people wanting to see me succeed and lead a good life. I have made enough friends in here so much so at times it really overwhelms me that I cannot manage any time for them. For the affection that is showered on us here in the UK as well, I can only say that we are gifted. 

Last year, I did say that I would keep life simple. I believe it is still simple, though at times I feel a bit suffocated. May be life is a bit on high pace and tougher than what I anticipated, but again no complaints as it is a choice that we made and we will sail through this. It is a learning process and moving another inch to some sort of maturity. The pressure, the stress, the hardships are probably back to me after a long time, but I know I have no other choice than surviving. I, just like anyone else, will keep hoping that the new dawn is going to be just great.

As of what I shall intend to do the following year, I just want to do justice to the sacrifices the ladies have made for my career sake. I'm determined to make it happen. I know life is not easy and it keeps testing me every moment, but I know I'll prevail. So will everyone!

And finally, Thanks to everyone who had me in your thoughts on this day! These positive vibes would make me more determined. Ensure that you keep showering me with your love.. 

Back to my famous lines...

I love to be loved...

I live to be loved...

Regards,

Raj.

From the Desk of Raj

While Orkut pulled down curtains on itself, just thought I can reflect on what it meant to us as an Internet Social Media.

I was introduced to Orkut by my cousin in 2006 a period when I was traveling quite often and for people who knew me then, I was practically living alone even when in India. It was a period/phase in my life when I had literally none from my comfort zone around. My family or friends. 

When Orkut was introduced to me, I did not know what this was all about. Though I did know and had in the past in a very few occasions, have been part of some chat tools and rooms on yahoo and so on, this was new. Creating a web profile with interests and so on was ok, but little did I know that this medium would have an impact as long as I'm gonna live.

Like everyone, it started off with searching few people and eventually ending up in some good large communities. I was fortunate to be part of a few and a couple of significant ones like Kongu Vellala Gounders community (thanks for my racial side ;)) and Chennai Rulezz where very confidently I can say that I have met quite a lot whom would remain in my life as friends for ever.

While the Orkut is said to be a social networking site, my view is that it was rather a social engineering site. The kind of debates that it enabled on various topics from religion to cinema to politics to of course internal politics, it was more than a collaboration site. It was a real virtual world, as weird as it may sound. For instance within Chennai Rulezz community we have debated on Islam/Hinduism, Srilankan issue, TR to Super Star, from KK to Amma, celebrated b'days, got drunk virtually, attended weddings virtually (a few from virtual world did attend my wedding), we shed tears when someone in the community passed away, there were instances like in every family when there was a dispute when someone dashes out of the home and then coming back, songs, games, music, some affairs, a few marrying and last but not the least quite a few helping building careers!! We had elections and bloody hell, I was a moderator for one of the largest Orkut communities! Now if it is not real what else could be real. Quite a few of us met with, watched movies, dine and wine, phone conferences, it was such a saviour for people like me when at times you feel lonely.

Yes Facebook (I know I'll posting this blog there as well) moved us back into a social networking mode and with the advent of WhatsApp/Telegram we may even move away from other collaboration and social networking sites, however, Orkut would remain special for all the experiences and emotions it gave us. Personally, Orkut was a companion when I really was living alone and at time to the extent of me being addicted to it that I checked Orkut than Outlook. 

I have made enough friends most of them still remain physically strangers but attached in a virtual world where like anyone of our friends whom we know, we wish each other all the best from the bottom of our hearts.

Long Live Orkut!! You will live as long as two of the Orkut friends remain alive or even better, as long as a couple married because of Orkut and their children and great grand children live on, Orkut will live.

To all my Orkut friends, we owe Orkut a lot for it has done to us! Glad that we all met there and have remained friends there after.. Cheers!!!!

PS.: Only my Orkut friends know why I had to name the blog this way! The clue is, that desk is the reason why this blog is in existence. :)

Regards,

Raj.